Hamburgersexual & Hamburgershipping
Apr. 16th, 2012 12:34 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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hamburgeredA couple of things!
One! America is sexual.
Obsessed. With. Condoms.
1. Made the first latex condoms.
2. Condom size battle with Russia. (though his boss made him initiate it).
3. Apparently has a condom on him...probably at all times.
Two! He might be straight (he's very secure in his masculinity though and doesn't seem homophobic, though a little ill informed).
1. He's described his ideal girl openly (this doesn't stand on its own, but there's more)
2. He's a hit with the ladies~
3. He doesn't seem to understand how being gay works (though this might be just a fluke, I think someone who was gay or bi would have realized that easily.)
4. This might be reading too much into it, but he didn't show any interest in Noto during the Christmas event, showing more interest in talking to that other guy about football. (Meanwhile in the background we have France, England, and Poland all hitting on Noto. Although Poland might have just been being Poland. I don't know.)
Three!
I don't ship these in canon for reasons other than America possibly being heterosexual (though with the proper development or an AU I might ship them in RP):
a) USUK or UKUS.
For one thing, I think their tension is more about brother relations. That sort of brother-tension isn't uncommon in Hetalia, as it was seen with Iceland and Norway. You know those scenes in romance novels or something when two people have obvious sexual tension and an outsider comments, calling them boyfriend/girlfriend and they FREAK OUT? America and England had that when someone asked if they were brothers. Being raised by England (with all the baggage of wetting the bed and any other embarrassing events) as well as the revolution where America told England he was no longer his brother and early on England telling America not to call him brother makes it seem more likely there is more tension about being brothers than wanting to fuck or kiss. I really don't think they have sexual tension, I think for America it would be all all emotional tension. (Also often this pairing when RPed turns into OHHHH POOR ENGLAND FEEL SORRY FOR HIM and tbh I don't think America would indulge that for too long before fucking off and talking to someone else. Even though he DOES care about England.)
b) AmeriCan, Canada/America.
I've read really awesome fic for this, but I view their relationship as brotherly as well. I feel like Canada would a) find America too stifling and b) I don't think America would pay enough attention to Canada. If you haven't noticed, he's kind of a douche to Canada. He gets Canada in a lot of trouble, he pays very little attention to him, and he threw a ball at his crotch, okay? Now Canada when he gets going can make America cry, but I feel like a romantic relationship between these two is very very unlikely. However, I do ship them in the most romantic brolationship ever.
This is my OTP for America. Kidding aside (I'm not kidding.), when it comes to shipping, I'm going to try and avoid serious shipping. For the same reason Himaruya does! Ship teasing is way more fun than actual shipping.
Favorite things to ship tease:
USUK (I don't ship it, but it is hella easy to get people riled up for this pairing for real), America/Lithuania, RussAme, Panda Hero, Ameripan and FrUS.
Four!
Also, I'm going to be avoiding things of sexual nature with America. I might kid about it, but I am a terrible smut RPer and I have learned this. Through experience. Fade to black might be okay though, just ask me.
One! America is sexual.
Obsessed. With. Condoms.
1. Made the first latex condoms.
2. Condom size battle with Russia. (though his boss made him initiate it).
3. Apparently has a condom on him...probably at all times.
Two! He might be straight (he's very secure in his masculinity though and doesn't seem homophobic, though a little ill informed).
1. He's described his ideal girl openly (this doesn't stand on its own, but there's more)
2. He's a hit with the ladies~
3. He doesn't seem to understand how being gay works (though this might be just a fluke, I think someone who was gay or bi would have realized that easily.)
4. This might be reading too much into it, but he didn't show any interest in Noto during the Christmas event, showing more interest in talking to that other guy about football. (Meanwhile in the background we have France, England, and Poland all hitting on Noto. Although Poland might have just been being Poland. I don't know.)
Three!
I don't ship these in canon for reasons other than America possibly being heterosexual (though with the proper development or an AU I might ship them in RP):
a) USUK or UKUS.
For one thing, I think their tension is more about brother relations. That sort of brother-tension isn't uncommon in Hetalia, as it was seen with Iceland and Norway. You know those scenes in romance novels or something when two people have obvious sexual tension and an outsider comments, calling them boyfriend/girlfriend and they FREAK OUT? America and England had that when someone asked if they were brothers. Being raised by England (with all the baggage of wetting the bed and any other embarrassing events) as well as the revolution where America told England he was no longer his brother and early on England telling America not to call him brother makes it seem more likely there is more tension about being brothers than wanting to fuck or kiss. I really don't think they have sexual tension, I think for America it would be all all emotional tension. (Also often this pairing when RPed turns into OHHHH POOR ENGLAND FEEL SORRY FOR HIM and tbh I don't think America would indulge that for too long before fucking off and talking to someone else. Even though he DOES care about England.)
b) AmeriCan, Canada/America.
I've read really awesome fic for this, but I view their relationship as brotherly as well. I feel like Canada would a) find America too stifling and b) I don't think America would pay enough attention to Canada. If you haven't noticed, he's kind of a douche to Canada. He gets Canada in a lot of trouble, he pays very little attention to him, and he threw a ball at his crotch, okay? Now Canada when he gets going can make America cry, but I feel like a romantic relationship between these two is very very unlikely. However, I do ship them in the most romantic brolationship ever.
This is my OTP for America. Kidding aside (I'm not kidding.), when it comes to shipping, I'm going to try and avoid serious shipping. For the same reason Himaruya does! Ship teasing is way more fun than actual shipping.
Favorite things to ship tease:
USUK (I don't ship it, but it is hella easy to get people riled up for this pairing for real), America/Lithuania, RussAme, Panda Hero, Ameripan and FrUS.
Four!
Also, I'm going to be avoiding things of sexual nature with America. I might kid about it, but I am a terrible smut RPer and I have learned this. Through experience. Fade to black might be okay though, just ask me.
